View Full Version : New and Terrified.
My name is Hannah and my boyfiend Robert is joining the RAF in August.
It may sound like its a long way off but its really not for me the time is just flying by really quickly and I feel like its not long before I lose him.
We have been together for nearly 2 years and i love him more than anything, our relationship has had quite a few ups and downs but we have got through it and I cant imagine being without him.
I'm worried that things are going to get really hard for us again when he goes away.
I dont know what im going to do without him, I see him everyday and we spend every night together.
He really is my world and I just cant get my head around him not being here with me and being in danger.
when he gets based somewhere im not gonna be able to move there for another 2 years because im at uni, i dont know alot about it but i feel like im never going to see him and that cant be good for a relationship as close as ours, i feel like he is being taken away from me.
I feel like he isnt upset about it all.
I really really dont want him to go and i spend so much time crying and thinking about and it just feels like if i dont stop thinking about it im going to go insane because i really cant handle it.
I dont have anyone I can talk to about it apart from him and I dont think he understands, all he sees is him getting to do what he wants and im being left behind.
Im Terrified, and need someone to talk to.
Hannah x
Hi Hannah.. where is it you live? because he goes away for like, 6 weeks for basic training and then is at the school of training either st athan or cramwell.. whats he going to do?
i met my guy when he was already in the raf and we were inseperable for 9 months before he had to move away. it was sooo painful and i was just like you, but even when he said things like, i'd leave the RAF for you, i just couldnt ask him to -its his career - and a REALLY good one, and even though its hard, you CAN make it work, and you appreciate each other even more...
once he's out of basic training, he'll be free to see you every weekend and he gets quite a bit of leave... i spose teh issue is how far away are you?
im going home now but will be back on in 1 hour if you wanna chat xxxx
I live in sherwood in Nottingham, i dont really know how far away he is going to be but i think tis gonna be too far to come back as often as he thinks he will.
he is going into RAF police.
I feel like there are so many people whos partners are already away and im moaning when i still have mine.
but i feel like if i feel so down about it all the time now how am i going to be able to cope when he actually goes.
Its like its consumed my life and im counting down the days i have left with him.
He never says he wouldnt go for me, i dont expect him not to go but i feel like he loves it more than me.
I lost my best friend a few years ago and that was so painful, i couldnt lose robert he is my life and i just dont know what im gonna do, i hate my course and my job and i dont get on at home that well, he is the only thing that keeps me going.
I judt dont feel like the day will come that i talk or think about him going and i dont breakdown i dont think i can ever be happy about it.
its not the life i planned i want to come home to him everynight and wake up with him every morning.
I probably wont still be on here then because rob is due back soon and i get really upset talking about it so im gonna get off soon.
but if you leave me a message ill prob be on tomorrow :-)
its really nice to have someone to talk to about it.
Hannah x
Firstly welcome to wags Hannah :)
I know your oh going away is a daunting idea and like you my oh signed up (army though) 6 months after we got together and as alien as it is at the start, things do get better and it brings you closer together I think, as they say "absence makes the heart grow fonder" :) it makes the seeing each other again special!
With us wags help you'll get through it hun, if ever you need a chat just pm :)
xxx
welcome
My oh is on basic training at the moment in the RAF, we have been together for almost 2 years and i was exactly the same when i found out he was going to join. i spent months crying and worrying about EVERYTHING.
When he first went i cried for about a week, now its a lot easier.
I wont lie its hard but you do get used to it, this is coming from somone who was a mess fpr months.
You do miss them but the time you spend together is amazing.
he on week 9 now and was ment to be back tomorrow but he got put back 2 weeks for failing fitness so has another 2 weeks left.
If you need any advise or anyone to chat to i here just private message me.
the girls on this site are amazing too and will help you through any hard times u have
aww hun, first off big hugs xx
my oh is in the RAF, hes been in nearly exactly a year and he passes out from his final training this thursday, and i am the proudest woman to have him as my fiance.
He went to Halton for basic (everyone goes there) for 6 weeks like Bethylou says. The first 3 weeks are the hardest, they won't come home at all. Then if they behave (!) he'll be allowed home for his first weekend, and nearly every weekend after that until phase one pass out. Passing out is amazing, its a lovely day and each recruit usually gets 3-4 tickets to that so make sure you get on to him asap that you want one, u wnt want to miss it!!
Then after phase one, he'll go to phase 2, im not sure where that is for police? my oh's a PTI, and is at cosford and has been since June last year. He'll have been there for 9 months by the time he finishes at the end of this week. He's had almost every weekend off from 5pm friday and then goes back to base sunday night (some of the lads chance it and leave crack of dawn on monday!!) he also had 3 seperate weeks of leave at random points through phase 2 which he told me way in advance so i could book them off work.
Weve been together for 6 and a half years (from when i was 16 and he was 17) and have lived together for that whole time (firstly at college in halls and then into our own house when we were 18) so believe me hun, i know how you feel about feeling lost without him, but it WILL get easier, I promise. It makes the time you do spend together amazing, make sure you make lots of fun plans!! were getting married in June and now i can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, in that were moving into married quarters at his new base in scotland after the wedding. Theres 15 lads on my oh's phase 2 and 12 of them got posted to their preferred base, my oh wasnt too bothered as we quite like moving around and are now moving from somerset in the south west to the top of scotland!! but as i say, most of the lads got based closish to home or where they wanted to be.
keep busy is the main tip i can give you, and come on here lots-im addicted!! all the girls are amazing and give lots of advice and support on everything from our men to girly gossip!!
private message me if you want anytime hun
xxxx
i was a mess too for the first few weeks.. it was so hard... but i know it doesnt seem like it, but it DOES get easier.
i feel like that right now cos hes gone for ages ppl say it gets easier, but until it does, you wont believe them!! what you need to remember is this is a big opportunity for him so he will be excited and if it feels like he loves it more than you, he doesnt, hes just a man and doesnt realise thats how you feel!!!
even if its hard, if you support him now it'll be easier for both of you... he'll miss you just as much he just wont cry to you!!! it used to be so frustrating when my oh didnt seem to miss me but i know he does... deep down somewhere!!!! lol smile he'll make it up to youxxxxx
Hi Hannah,
My h2b may be joining the RAF in August as well. He needs to pass his fitness test with is coming up. I know how you feel. I just got engaged to my h2b and it feels like we are more closer now and it feels like im going to loss him when we goes away.
Jenny x
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