Rachel
,
A man wakes up in hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in.
"Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up on the motorway. You're going to be OK, you'll walk again, everything, but something happened. Its difficult trying to break this gently but....your penis was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it."
The patient groans a bit but the doctor goes on "But it's going to be alright, we now have the technology to build you a new one and it will work just as well as your old one did, better in fact. But the thing is, it doesn't
come cheap. It's a thousand pounds an inch".
The patient perks up at this, even though it's a thousand pounds an inch.
"So the thing is" the doctor says, "it's for you to decide how many inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife. Its clearly a very important decision.If you had a five inch one before and you decide to go for a nine incher she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before and you decide only to invest in a five incher this time she might be disappointed. So it's important that she plays a vital role in helping you make the decision."
The patient agrees to talk with his wife and the doctor comes back the next day.
"So" says the doctor "Have you spoken with your wife?"
"I have." says the fellow.
"And has she helped you in making the decision?"
"She has" says the bloke.
"And what's been decided?" asks the doctor. . .
"We're having a new kitchen".
The doctor comes in.
"Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up on the motorway. You're going to be OK, you'll walk again, everything, but something happened. Its difficult trying to break this gently but....your penis was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it."
The patient groans a bit but the doctor goes on "But it's going to be alright, we now have the technology to build you a new one and it will work just as well as your old one did, better in fact. But the thing is, it doesn't
come cheap. It's a thousand pounds an inch".
The patient perks up at this, even though it's a thousand pounds an inch.
"So the thing is" the doctor says, "it's for you to decide how many inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife. Its clearly a very important decision.If you had a five inch one before and you decide to go for a nine incher she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before and you decide only to invest in a five incher this time she might be disappointed. So it's important that she plays a vital role in helping you make the decision."
The patient agrees to talk with his wife and the doctor comes back the next day.
"So" says the doctor "Have you spoken with your wife?"
"I have." says the fellow.
"And has she helped you in making the decision?"
"She has" says the bloke.
"And what's been decided?" asks the doctor. . .
"We're having a new kitchen".