OH went to Afghan last week

[chelle23]

Hi all, I'm a newbie here, my OH went to Afghanistan last Wednesday. I just wanted to post something on this forum as I know you don't need an account to view it. For all those who are going through the same thing, the first few days are the worst. I spent Thursday and Friday just sobbing constantly. I couldn't eat, I didn't know how I was going to get through it.

I'm in the RAF myself so I was shocked that I reacted that badly, I just assumed I'd be able to cope better. The only thing that helped me was reading through these posts and realising that I'm NOT alone. Unfortunately my account has taken a few days to get activated so when I really needed some support I wasn't able to post a thread. So I just wanted to write this so that if there's anyone else out there who feels like that, it does get better.

For those who are thinking what I was - "I don't want to cope or feel better, I just want him back so I don't NEED to cope" - you need to communicate with him. Lack of comms for those 48 hours made me feel physically sick, but I wrote him an e-bluey and as I was writing it I started to feel connected to him and it really did ease the hurting.

I've rambled on loads here, but if what I've said will help someone just a tiny bit, then I've achieved what I wanted.

M xx

[Archiesmum]

Hiya, welcome to the site. Im sorta new :)

My OH is on Basic Training and although its not Afgan i still know what you mean.

Ive kept myself very busy so not been to bad but i do miss him alot.

Hope your doing ok.

xx

[priscilla]

Hi hon welcome to WAGs - my OH will be going to Afghan in a month so I'll be right there with the wailing and crying as well... This site is amazing and I'm not sure I'd cope if I hadn't found it. Have also got lots of plans to keep super-busy while he's away.

Hope to chat with you again soon!

xxx

[Vickyx]

Welcome to WAGS Michelle! Nice to meet you!

Sounds like you've had a tough time over the last few days but glad WAGS could be of some help to you as I'm sure it will be in the future (as it has for all of us :D).

So how long have you been with your oh?

xxx

[chelle23]

Yeah, Basic's really intense and you've got to put up with loads. Also, neither of you know what to expect, so that's really hard. When does he pass out?

I was doing OK, but I just missed him on Facebook, he'd tried to chat but I was away from the computer. It just suddenly started me off again because I feel powerless when I know I can't speak to him. We normally talk on the phone at least 10 times a day so the communications thing is killing me.

If Halton's anything like I remember it, the comms will be difficult for you too, since the signal's so bad up there, so you'll probably be sat waiting for him to call. It's poo, but you're going to feel so proud of him when he's on parade passing out, so look forward to that.

Take care xx

Vicky, think you posted as I was writing! I've been with my OH for 5 years, been promised the diamond when he gets back, so I've got loads to look forward to. WAGS is a great idea, it's perfect for stopping me moping about getting upset!

Priscilla - I know what you mean about planning to keep busy. I've put off doing loads of stuff - little things like watching that girly movie, or sorting out my wardrobe - until he went, so that the time would be filled up. I'm counting down weekends too, since that's not as scary as counting down the days - only 11 to go already!

[ness&rich]

hi chelle,

my OH goes afghan in december (roughly 7weeks). i no i have to be strong and try and get on with what i have to day on a day to day bases, and luckly work is realy supportive and have said i can have the weeks before and after deployment off as well as if im finding it difficult through the 6months just to let them no and someone will cover which is great... i guess.

me and my OH have only been together a short amont of time and yet we have already met the families and planning a holiday after afghan as well as finding a place out side of base, but he seems to be bringing himself down alot. when we first started talking about after afghan he was always saying 'when' but now everything is always 'if'... would you say thats pretty normal??

ness xox