View Full Version : Why am I so upset over a silly photo?
Hi girlies,
Just want to let of a bit of steam on here. My other half ( who I am due to marry next year) is on week 18 of his training up Catterick. He only comes home about twice a month, sometimes not that. I knew that he went out drinking with all the other lads every friday and saturday but i stumbled across a photo of him on facebook with his arm around another girl and its really upset me. I know im being silly because it looks innocent and its not as if he is snogging her or anything but its made me stop and think ''well i dont know what he gets upto up there''
I text him to tell him i'd seen the photo and had no reply. A few hours later i text him again to say sorry for my snappy message id just had a bad day and would he ring me later...( he usually calls me every day unless he is on excersise) Anyway, iv heard nothing..... Do you think its because he is busy, or is he angry with me ''accusation'' or has he a guilty conciensce?!
Iv been with him for nearly four years and I do try and trust him, but when he has a drink he gets a flirty and touchy feely.... He's never cheated before and I have no reason to believe that he ever will but for some reason that picture has really struck a nerve.
xxx
oh yeah, i forgot to say, he has banned me from going out clubbing incase i get drunk and 'have lads try it on with me' ?!
Aww hun, it's terrible when they're away coz your imagination can run away with you. I understand you not liking the photo I would be exactly the same and would have text my oh just as you did. As for him not contacting you, I would hope it's for logistical reasons that he can't contact you. Maybe they went on a last minute ex or summit?? Or in my area our masts have been down for 2 days, he could be punished and phone taken off him or maybe he has no credit?? There could be a perfectly good explanation as to why he's not been able to contact you. As you apologied I would have thought he would be in contact to put your mind at rest even if he's angry at you. I would say try not to dwell on it until he has spoken to you about it, I know that's easier said than done but you'll drive youself crazy thinking about it otherwise. As you say the photograph itself is not incriminating. I hope he gets in contact soon hunni xxx
Hey hun, I can totally understand why you're feeling like that, I would be driving myself mad in your position.
Maybe text him and explain that you totally trust him but you're just finding it hard seeing that picture when you have been 'banned' from going out for the exact same reason.
Keep us updated hun, hope you're ok
xx
oh yeah, i forgot to say, he has banned me from going out clubbing incase i get drunk and 'have lads try it on with me' ?!
well now you have ammo to call him a hypocrite, he can't expect that from you, that is incredibly harsh, he has to trust you. xxx
Thanks for your replys girls, means so much. thank God for this forum... I dont think anybody else can quite understand our problems can they? I mean, Iv told one of my close friends but shes not in the same position and to be honest she was saying things that made me feel worse like that all the girls up there are after a squaddie....So not what I wanted to hear!!
I know he is on ex from today so I probably wont be able to speak to him until when he gets back, and I dont even know when that wil be! Argh!! xx
It's annoying they have good excuses for not being in touch so you can't quite tell how honest they're being lol!! I think Ruth's idea of sending a text is a good idea but I'm guesing h'es probs left already. The one thing I find relaxing about ex is that i know not to keep looking at my phone waiting for him to text coz i know he can't so i duno if that is any consolation for you?? But maybe send him a nice text that explains why you felt that way and I'm sure he'll get in contact asap- grr to not knowing when he'll be back!!! xxx
But maybe send him a nice text that explains why you felt that way and I'm sure he'll get in contact asap- grr to not knowing when he'll be back!!! xxx
Yeah I did send him a slushy message sayin i was sorry for my snappy message, i put that id just had a bad day and seeing that photo made it even worse, its only because i love you so much, i get jealous when i see you with other girls because i want you all to myself!
I do feel a lot better for getting things off my chest on here, and all your replys are really reassuring so thanks :D
Yeah I did send him a slushy message sayin i was sorry for my snappy message, i put that id just had a bad day and seeing that photo made it even worse, its only because i love you so much, i get jealous when i see you with other girls because i want you all to myself!
I do feel a lot better for getting things off my chest on here, and all your replys are really reassuring so thanks :D
Oh ok hun well I think you've done all you can so just sit tight, and let us know wen he's back in contact :D xxx
aww hunni bless ya. i've been in the exact same position before, hubbi was based in Germany before we got married and i never knew what he got up to. i used to see pics on fb and it used to be horrible. but i knew he'd never cheat on me and he's not done anything to make me think he has or ever will. its so easy to get paranoid and take things the wrong way when they're not there.
there will most probably be a reason why he hasnt got back to you, hubbi always had one lol. hope he texts or calls you soon hunni.
oh and as for the ban on you going clubbing, i wouldnt accpet that at all!!! if he's going out then so should you. just coz other men might try it on doesnt mean you shouldnt go out and have a good time. trust is a 2 way thing, you trust him to go out and he should trust you hunni xxx
Well, he called me last night. Sounded very grumpy... He said he didnt finish until late on tuesday and thats why he didnt call. I casually said that id text him and that did he recieve it but he said he hadnt recieved any messages.... I dont know if hes just saying that to avoid the subject or what but at least it didnt turn into a row! xxx
Well, he called me last night. Sounded very grumpy... He said he didnt finish until late on tuesday and thats why he didnt call. I casually said that id text him and that did he recieve it but he said he hadnt recieved any messages.... I dont know if hes just saying that to avoid the subject or what but at least it didnt turn into a row! xxx
I would just leave it for now hun, least you're talking to eachother :) I'm assuming he's on xmas leave next week too?? Maybe talk to him about it then, no point getting into arguments over the phone if you're gona see him soon xxx
to be honest hun i would have felt exactly the same.I knwo OH wouldnt cheat etc but its always at the back of our minds.
Its good that you are talking now and i agree with stacey, maybe just leave it.
xxx
yeah your right, im not going to bring it up, lifes to short as they say and I'm ok about it now. I dont want to spend our time together rowing. xxx
yeah your right, im not going to bring it up, lifes to short as they say and I'm ok about it now. I dont want to spend our time together rowing. xxx
Well i think if you wanna bring up that's not an issue...even if you say to him you should be allowed to go out clubbing if he does!! But I would just wait till you're with him and can talk to him casually in person and not make a big thing out of it. if it's upset you then there's nothing wrong about talking about it, but it's always harder to talk to someone when they're not actullay with you if you get me xxxx
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