priscilla
,
I sang this song with my barbershop group at uni and it's a bit cynical but is simply one of the funniest things ever!
The first day after Christmas
My true love and I had a fight
And so I chopped the pear tree down
And burnt it just for spite
And with a single cartridge
I shot that blasted partridge
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The second day after Christmas
I pulled on the old rubber gloves
And very gently wrung the necks
Of both the turtle doves
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The third day after Christmas
My mother caught the croup
I had to use the three French hens
To make some chicken soup
The four calling birds were a big mistake
For the language was obscene
The five gold rings were completely fake
And they turned my fingers green
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The sixth day after Christmas
The six laying geese wouldn't lay
I gave the whole damn gaggle to
The RSPCA
On the seventh day what a mess I found
All seven of the swimming swans had drowned
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The eighth day after Christmas
Before they could suspect
I rounded up the...
Eight maids a-milking, nine ladies dancing, ten lords a-leaping, eleven pipers piping, twelve drummers drumming
(well actually, I kept one of the drummers...)
And sent them back collect!
I said 'My true love
We are through love'
And I said in so many words
'Furthermore your Christmas gifts are for the birds!'
Merry Christmas
xxx
The first day after Christmas
My true love and I had a fight
And so I chopped the pear tree down
And burnt it just for spite
And with a single cartridge
I shot that blasted partridge
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The second day after Christmas
I pulled on the old rubber gloves
And very gently wrung the necks
Of both the turtle doves
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The third day after Christmas
My mother caught the croup
I had to use the three French hens
To make some chicken soup
The four calling birds were a big mistake
For the language was obscene
The five gold rings were completely fake
And they turned my fingers green
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The sixth day after Christmas
The six laying geese wouldn't lay
I gave the whole damn gaggle to
The RSPCA
On the seventh day what a mess I found
All seven of the swimming swans had drowned
My true love, my true love
My true love gave to me
The eighth day after Christmas
Before they could suspect
I rounded up the...
Eight maids a-milking, nine ladies dancing, ten lords a-leaping, eleven pipers piping, twelve drummers drumming
(well actually, I kept one of the drummers...)
And sent them back collect!
I said 'My true love
We are through love'
And I said in so many words
'Furthermore your Christmas gifts are for the birds!'
Merry Christmas
xxx