View Full Version : newbie in need of advice!
hi everyone. this is my first post. im just lookin for some support and advice really. none of my friends men are in the forces so they dont know how im feeling. the guy im seein is due to be deplyoyed to afghanistan early march and im breakin my heart. iv only ever seen a guy in the raf, but never had any experience of him goin away. iv only bn seein my man since mid december but have fallen for him pretty fast/vice versa. we are plannin to write and email each other. but just the thought of him goin makes me cry.im actually off work with depression right now. any of you ladies have a good coping mechanism? i know its not goin to be walk in the park but just anythin that would make it a little easier. any advice on what to put in letters would be good too. want to try cheer him up while hes out there as best i can. thanks x
Hey chick and welcome to wags.
Sorry to hear about your guy being deployed soon. My mr is currently in Iraq and alot of the girls have guys away at the moment so we know how you feel.
In my experience I found the lead up to them going is worse than the actual tour, i was a wreck before matthew left, i had a annoying nervous twitch aswel, but as soon as he left the twitch went and i went into 'survival mode'. The way i think about it is there is nothing we can do about it so to just get on with this back home. I write once a week, and email everyday, i send e blueys and blueys aswel. The letters i send just tell him what ive been up to, or whats going on in my life. I send parcels which contain...well.... crap basically, sweets, toys, pictures. Lol
I hope this helps babe. You'll be ok, like i said the waiting for them to deploy is worse. xxx
Hey hun I'm kate my husband is currently out in afghanistan h edeployed 5 weeks after we married which was kinda hard but you get through it other wise you will send yourself loopy! Martyn is due hom enext month so we are on the back end of the tour! Kate is right in saying the lead up to it is the hardest part. My best ways of coping are big countdown charts for each month crossing a day off every day and keeping stupidly busy! Im nackered have split days off but all worth it and I have to say 6 months has flown! Take care hun and look forward to chatting soon xxxxxxxxx
hiya hun iam Andrea an i know how u feel while i was with my ex i didnt know that many wags so i found it so hard him bein in afghan but i found as i got to know them things got a little easier cozi knew wot to expect an when i wrote to him i used to tell him bout things i had been doing an stuff like that an my current bf we write to each other an he said he loves reading my letters coz i tell him what i been doing an they r just really random an plus sending packages with random things in them is really fun to when andy goes to afghan iam gonna send him the biggest pair of granny pants i can find n set him a chalange an tell him i wanna see pics it would give him a giggle an a gud thing to do is send him pics of ur days out with friends an other stuff an big huggs if u ever need to talk iam always here xxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey babe, i am mel, I can only repeat the advice that the girls have said, just keep yourslef real busy, and plan something for EVERY weekend, to give you soemthing to look forward, Draw yourslef a chart with each month on, and cross each day off as it goes! I remember i was in your position 6 months ago! It will fly by babe, you just gotter keep yourself busy with writing letters, blueys, emails, and have a 'parcel day' each week so you can pack him a parcle, i pit in food, drinks, toys, photos and a letter!
I also think that the build up to the tour is worse, becuase when they are gone, you have no choice but to just get on with it!
You will be fine, we will get you through it, there is a lots of girls with their oh on tours, and about to deploy
Here if you need me!
X
Welcome to wags lovely xx
thanks everyone for replyin, im sure you guys have heard that post all too often:D but i really appreciate yous bein so quick with it and what great advice. its good to know theres someone i can talk to. my mates are great but like i said they dont understand. his sister is actually my best friend so i konw the family, but theyre obviously stressin too and i dont want to make it worse for them. his tour is 6months and he gets the 2weeks r&r at some point. hes been to loadsa places and iraq before i met him but iv heard afghanistan is far worse, helmand province but he is lookin forward to going:confused:!!!!! and hes goin to be in a mastiff so kind of puts my mind at rest......slightly because hel be stickin out the top of it. its just this is all new to me, and its the waitin for him to go. hes away trainin just now, thought last weekend would be the last time seen him, but hes back next, and possibly the one after!!!wish i knew so i could prepare myself. goin to buy a calender and a big red marker (possibly granny pants) thanks again x
ps. what exactly are blueys? hes mentioned them to me, but dosnt know eactly what they are himself:Ddosnt even know how to work email bless him!
If you go to the post office and ask for blueys, they will give you blue envolopes which open out to be pieces of paper, write your letter on them and then fold them back into an envolope and vola! :D These you ca just pop into the post box annd they are free to send! as are all parcels and letters but with normal letters they have to be taken to the post office.
There is also e bluey www.ebluey.com (http://www.ebluey.com)
How you feeling about him going now babe. My OH loves tours he looks forward to them, its becuase they sign on to do this, they are like extreme adrenaline junkies lol:rolleyes:
Welcome Babe...im Claire..and im 21, and my fella is in Iraq at the mo...hes been there now for almost 4 months.... cant wait to see him....
Everyone seems to have given u the best advice....girls on here are great...hope to speak to you soon xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I'm Sarah my OH is in his 5th month in Afghanistan. I think letter writing is great, and as you're still a new couple I bet you'll find out so much about eachother.
Everyone else has already given the good advice, so I'll just say welcome! :D xxx
hello achtungnat!! welcome 2 wags xx im lorraine btw!
Is your oh scotts? They are taking over the mastiffs from martyn I think!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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