KEEPING IN TOUCH!

When our men are away keeping in touch can more often than not be quite a difficult process. Not because of today’s modern technology being unable to keep up with our needs but, in many cases, purely and simply down the fact that our men can’t tell us when they will call and in some cases where they will be!

We all know how frustrating and heartbreaking it can be as your other half is leaving and you feel like your whole world is crumbling around you or….he has managed to call you but he can’t tell you when he can call you next. This seems to be something that we seem to have trouble comprehending! We have to remember that in cases where our men are in Iraq or Afghanistan and similar places they are very often rationed to one call a week but also life out in these places is far from routined or normal. So, he could arrange to call on Sunday night and suddenly everything changes and then….no call!! I can remember feeling really angry and spending the whole of our next call moaning at him because he hadn’t called me and just making the whole 20 minutes a tirade of misery. I am not quite sure what I thought he was doing or getting up to - in fact I don’t think I had actually sat down and considered him at all in the whole process. All I thought about was how I felt…..me, me, me!! Talk about selfish. There I was at home - in OUR home, with our children and comfort all around me and all I did was ‘have a go!!’ The important thing to remember is that although it is hard for us it has to be even harder for our boys! They are out there away from everyone they love and all the comforts of home and more importantly they are living with the threat of violence and uncertainty.

So, what can we do? Keep the calls as cheery as possible and not spend the whole time moaning at the poor fella about what a hard time you are having. Of course he wants to hear that you miss him and love him but he also doesn’t want to hear that you are having a ball and it sounds as though you are not missing him. I suppose really it is all about finding the right balance. It is hard trying to be brave all the time but that’s why we are who we are. Armywags are strong, loyal women who are a breed apart. We love our men unconditionally and make sacrifices to enable them to continue to do what they do! But of course we also do not suffer fools gladly!!

Letters I always think are the best because when you are feeling down you can read them over and over again. Over the years I have heard from lots of soldiers that for them the letters are THE most important form of keeping in touch. Many of them keep letters with them when they are out on patrol so they can read them and feel close to their partners. E-blueys are great because they can be written whilst you are at work and your boss will think you are happily working away and be oblivious to what you are actually doing! They seem to get through pretty quick and although they are not as personal as a hand written letter they can be used to supplement your cards and letters you write whilst at home. Most people say that it means that their men got twice as many letters because they would type an e-bluey at work or at home in the morning and then sit at night and write a letter or card at the end of the day.

(I have put the link to the e-bluey site at the bottom of this page!)

Now, parcels. All squaddies love a parcel. Think of all his favourite choccies and biccies and stuff and each time you are out and about and you see something pick it up and start putting together a parcel. The cost of sending a parcel to a BFPO address is the same as it would be to send it to the UK mainland so it is not charged at an overseas rate - which is good! Just watch the weight! At the moment there is a petition to get the charges for parcels to soldiers dropped (click here to see our post about the petition ) Parcels are great for keeping up moral and putting in a few little things that are personal too really can make your fella smile. It’s a great way to brighten up his day and it also makes you feel like you are doing something useful - something worthwhile! I know for a fact that a lot of my sweets and goodies went on the kids in Kosovo and Bosnia but I didn’t mind because of the fact that it made me feel like it was all worthwhile! That something good was coming out of it all.

Keep strong girls and keep smiling and remember we are all here for each other.

For e-blueys go to - http://www.bfpo.mod.uk/