Kerry’s story…

No matter how young or old you are, being a soldier’s wife or girlfriend, is difficult. No one can really prepare for how you’re going to feel when the time comes for them being away.

From the start Paul was honest with me and always stated it was going to be a hard life being with someone in the forces…as we all know the army can and will call our men up at short notice. I think that is probably the one of the hardest things we have to put up with! I know my man loves his job and I would never ask him to leave the army for me, although, I do feel selfish sometimes and I would love nothing more than to have him with me all the time…God I have thought how I would love to qualify from university and look after HIM…like he and many others look after the welfare of us all!!

The hardest thing I have found personally is feeling like a stranger….OK we all say it’s great every time they return from the unknown but it’s like starting a relationship all over again. You get all nervous before they arrive back in your arms…but, given the chance, I would feel this way indefinitely, because I have found the man of my dreams and I love him with every ‘shitty’ little piece of my heart (to quote Paul). It is unfair but I would NEVER have it any other way, because Paul believes in what he does… therefore no matter how contradicted peoples conceptions are – whether they believe in the war or not, we stand by our men….because we love them and everything that comes with them…in our case… it’s the army!!

We all sit at home and watch the news and sheer panic hits when we hear bad news about unfortunate deaths…me for one, I cannot begin to explain how I felt when I had heard 3 soldiers from Paul’s regiment had been killed in action. I had a phone call from a friend hysterical, which of course set me off, OK the time it took us to find out it wasn’t our men took about an hour but that hour lasted a lifetime…I can tell you! I’m not one for letting my guard down, but let me tell you it was the most I had cried in a long-time…panic hits, you just feel as if your world is about to end!! Anyway, you get the call, and it’s not YOUR man and as horrible as it sounds… relief hits, followed by guilt… this wasn’t your man, but it was someone’s man, father or son!! The time Paul has been in Afghanistan may have been short (he only did half a tour) but this is the hardest tour I have ever experienced…..I just can’t wait to have Paul home and safe and where he belongs… with me!!

Other member's stories:
Charlotte's story